healing

Embrace Change: Bloom at Your Own Pace

July 25, 2025 Cosmic Kat

Change is inevitable yet it can’t be forced.
We all need to grow but each person does so at their own rate.

There may be times in our lives when we wish time would speed up so we can skip over a difficult or challenging chapter.

And there may be times when we wish the clock would slow down so we could have more time with our loved ones or we’re having the time of our lives and we just don’t want it to end.

I’ve spent a lot of my own life being frustrated at my perceived stagnation, desperately wanting things to move forward, for my life to “begin” as I measured myself against my peers who seemed to be moving on, growing up and achieving success in a way that I wasn’t.

And even on my healing journey there were times when I was trying to force a breakthrough, operating from the belief that I was broken and needed to be fixed ASAP.

Society, our families and institutions can all condition us to believe that there is a specific or optimal timeline we should be living by.

E.g. Buying a house by 30
Kids before age 40
Retirement by 70

But I believe in a creator and I believe in divine timing and as such I believe that we’re all uniquely crafted and designed to find our own path. Our soul came here on a mission to EXPERIENCE whatever that looks like, whether it’s straightforward or messy.

And to experience we must learn to enjoy the journey rather than hastening ahead to a specific destination.

Another lesson I’ve learnt is that the beauty of life happens when we’re not “trying” to make anything happen.

It’s those moments when we can be truly present and enjoy cuddling the dog in bed.
It’s the laughter and a moment of connection between two friends.
It’s a candyfloss sunset.
A grasshopper that you spy on a wall.
Your partner saying “I love you.”

I leave you with an affirmation I return to often when I need to cultivate a little patience…
“The slower I go, the faster I grow.” 🪴

Let me know in the comments something that you’re grateful for in your life right now.

If you’d like some additional support on your spiritual / life journey please book a free 1:1 call with me.

self love

How to break up with imposter syndrome and have a self-love summer

July 18, 2025 Cosmic Kat

I was in a situation recently where I was forced to confront my own stories of inadequacy and unworthiness.

I’ll set the scene.

I was on a hen-do with people I didn’t know (aside from the Bride-to-be) and travelling to London for the day.

I don’t often say “Yes” to group socialising opportunities since I’m Autistic and it drains me but I felt called to step out of my comfort zone because, A. It was a hen-do and I’ve never experienced one of those before and B. I’m going to the bride-to-be’s wedding but we haven’t spent a lot of time together so I thought it would be nice to get to know her better.

From the outset I was super-aware of my own inner dialogue and my shadow parts who were piping up and highlighting all of the reasons I didn’t belong or deserve to be a part of the group…

I don’t have a PHD (most of the other women did)
I’m not married
I don’t have a mortgage
I’m not a “girly girl”
I’m leaving early and they’re all going to judge me for that
I don’t drink alcohol

I could see these stories of inadequacy for the absolute bullshit that they were, and at the same time I observed myself trying to impress these women I didn’t even know.

I caught myself saying the things that my shadow thought they wanted to hear so that they would like me, like telling them about the fancy office I used to work in when I lived in London for a year (where I was absolutely miserable) or trying to legitimize my invite to the hen-do by telling them that I’m the best man’s girlfriend (which is true, but I felt like I was using this info as a sort of social visa.)

This internal struggle was then coupled with the very real and outer embarrassment of realising I had a big period blood stain on the back of my skirt.

On one level I really wasn’t bothered about this at all (it happens to the best of us) but it was a ghastly affront to that inner people-pleaser who was determined to make a good impression and be liked at all costs.

“Oh my goodness, whatever must they think of me, I can’t believe you didn’t take better precautions!” she wailed.

I’ve been on the journey of personal and spiritual development for a while now so in those moments when these frightened inner child and inner teenage parts were threatening to sabotage my day, I was able to pause and reassure them that everything was ok.

“It’s ok if I don’t become best friends with everyone I meet.”

“It’s ok if other people don’t understand me (or even like me).”

“It’s ok if I don’t have a husband, mortgage or PHD – I’m no less lovable or worthy.”

And when I was able to bring these parts of me into the light, I also found that I could see the truth of the situation.

If we hold firm to certain beliefs such as “I don’t belong” or “I don’t fit in” or “nobody likes me” then we will only see evidence that reinforces these beliefs or we’ll derive negative meaning from every inconsequential comment or action.

“But what did they really mean when they said that?” your brain will muse.

But when I affirmed to myself “I do belong here, I deserve to be here and I’m claiming my space on this hen-do” my perspective shifted.

I noticed kind gestures – like one woman giving me a safety pin so I could sort my skirt out and hide my blood stain.

I was able to be present and enjoy the shared creativity and fun that accompanied the crafting activity we were doing (we’d gone to a lino printing class).

And instead of being so absorbed in my own self-centered fear I was able to look outside of it and be curious about the other people there, asking them questions and discovering more about what makes them unique.

If you want to break up with imposter syndrome the first step is just becoming aware of that inner dialogue.

Observe it, see it for what it is.

The the next step is to stop letting it run the show by putting a new tape of positive affirmations and self-love statements in your mental cassette player:

“I am worthy and lovable no matter what.”

“It is my divine birth right to have fun and experience fulfilling relationships.”

“Every day in every way I am claiming my place on this Earth and developing loving, soul-family connections.”

A self-love summer isn’t about finding the perfect pair of sunglasses or moisturiser – it starts on the inside by making sure we’re not melting under the glaring sun of our own shame and fear.

Let me know in the comments something you’ve been saying about yourself that you know is absolute bullshit and what you could say to counter it.

If you’d like more support with breaking up with imposter syndrome I’m offering some 1:1 coaching sessions at a discounted price to support my Cosy Coven crowdfunder project.

Click here to find out more about the Cosy Coven and see all of the rewards available.

Tarot

From sceptic to mystic: How I fell in love with Tarot reading

July 11, 2025July 11, 2025 Cosmic Kat

When I was 20 I was living in Bologna, Italy doing an internship as part of my degree in languages.

On a Saturday evening, Via Dell’Independenza; a wide street which leads away from the main piazza, comes alive with street performers of all kinds, from dancing men painted blue to jugglers and puppeteers.

It was on this street that I spied a woman sitting with some cards at a little table covered in silk cloth. I’d never had a tarot reading before. I was intrigued albeit sceptical, but I couldn’t resist.

Like most 20 year old girls my main questions revolved around a boy, in this case an Italian / German who according to the cards thought I was “good hearted but a little crazy.” He confirmed a few days later that this was an accurate reading.

When the reading shifted from my tempestuous love life to career, the woman surprised me by saying that I’d make a great air hostess. This was something I’d been actively considering at the time since I spoke a few languages and loved to travel. “How could she possibly know that?” I thought. On that day, the Tarot cast its spell on me.

It wasn’t until a few years later when I was living in London that I came across a book at a second hand market called “Fortune Telling by Tarot cards” by Sasha Fenton. It felt like a sign and I could once again feel this art form calling to me.

In the beginning, having always been an A star student, I approached my study of the Tarot as a very serious academic endeavour.

Every morning and evening whilst travelling on the London underground to and from work, I would read this book religiously and try to commit to memory, word for the word, the meanings ascribed to each of the cards.

Since there are 78 cards in a standard tarot deck, this was no mean feat!

However, as time went on and I moved from reading for myself, to reading for others, I soon discovered that the best readings required a key ingredient: Intuition.

In order to accurately channel messages through the cards, it was vitally important for me to tune into feelings, sensation and emotion which took me beyond what I could glean from any book.

I also learnt that a reading began before I’d even shuffled the deck. If I took a moment to tune into my intuition and the energy of the querent beforehand I found I could often sense what the reading would be about. Sometimes I’d even be able to predict the specific cards that would come out!

Tarot reading is essentially storytelling, whether you see it as the cards telling the story of the subconscious mind, your angels and guides telling you what you need to know or a map to the future.

As with any work of art or literature, the reader or viewer’s interpretation is always subjective because it is shaped by their own personality, likes and life experiences.

For example, someone who’s never suffered the physical loss of a partner will experience a book like “One Day” very differently to someone who has. It’s the same with Tarot. Someone in love will no doubt have a different reaction to “The Lovers” card as opposed to someone who’s in the midst of a difficult break up.

Likewise an older person may connect differently with the “Death” card (which isn’t normally about literal death but ego death and transformation) than a younger person.

I’ve always loved stories. From a young age I wrote and illustrated my own little books and was an avid reader.

The Tarot is essentially an epic story that follows the hero’s journey model.

All of us are the hero in our own stories but we’re only living one part of that story at a time and no matter where we are in life, the cards can give us a loving nudge in the right direction (or a tough love kick up the arse when we’re living in denial).

And I also learnt that Spirit was developing its own language with me through the cards.

For example, if I was connecting with someone’s loved one in Spirit, the Judgment card would nearly always show up. Or if I was looking at a soulmate / twin flame connection, the two of wands would feature.

As I expanded my deck collection I also developed a unique relationship with different representations of the cards which sometimes included symbols or artwork that differed dramatically from the traditional Rider-Waite deck, for example. This also influenced the outcome of a reading.

What I love most about Tarot is that it helps us to get another perspective, helping us to take a zoomed out view at what we can’t normally see because we’re too close to it, our faces squished in anguish against the glass of our hopes, dreams and fears.

Tarot has helped me to take a step back, breathe and find a way forward, no matter how dark or unwieldy the path ahead has seemed.

Now I want to share this gift with you too.

If you’re curious to learn more about Tarot and would like to learn how to read the cards, whether for yourself or others, I’m hosting a beginner’s workshop this Monday online.

You’ll find all the details including how to register on the Facebook event HERE.

Spirituality

Poem: Dialogue with my Soul

April 24, 2024 Cosmic Kat

I asked my soul why she came here

Why choose such hell as this?

With devils disguised as kin

Burning fires within

The four walls built to keep me safe

I asked my soul why she came here

Why earth above all else?

A barren land Where I bit the hand

That told me who I ought to be

I asked my soul why she came here

Where pain is in abundance

An asteroid in a Systemic void

That we choose to call society

I asked my soul why she came here

With a faulty generator

A dozen pre-programmed ills

I asked my soul in anguish

Why did you bring me here?

My body is broken, the path unclear

And I’m losing my mind without a compass

And in the quiet pause she said

I came so you could know true

Liberation

My short collection of poems “The Earth and the Moon” is now available on Amazon in kindle and paperback – click here to buy the full version.

Mental Health, Spirituality

Let’s talk about…Depression

September 19, 2020September 19, 2020 Cosmic Kat

Let’s talk about depression…

I used to suffer from the debilitating kind.

I’d have those days where I’d wake up and I couldn’t lift my head because it felt like someone had placed a brick on my forehead.

When it got really bad I’d feel suicidal and I tried to kill myself twice.

I don’t believe depression is an illness in and of itself – it’s just a symptom of repressed emotion, trauma, stagnant energy or a knot in your heart that you haven’t honoured or acknowledged.

I don’t have those really dark moments anymore but I have felt quite heavy and low for the past couple of days.

I couldn’t figure out why.

Then this morning I pulled an angel card for Archangel Haniel (a moon goddess) and it said “Honour your feelings.”

So I did.

I took a deep breath and did a few rounds of EFT tapping, allowing myself to honour and acknowledge all of what I was feeling – stuck, frustrated, angry with myself, fed up that things in my life weren’t moving fast enough, impatient, perfectionistic.

The tears came and I let them.

I leant in to that resistance and afterwards I felt so much lighter and brighter.

The perfectionist in me didn’t even want to acknowledge I was being a perfectionist so that’s why I’d gone into a slump – you don’t have to worry about getting things perfect if you don’t try at all.

But there is a middle ground – I can accept that my best today is good enough and that will change from day to day.

Today honour how you’re feeling and allow yourself to step into flow and out of resistance.

You are ENOUGH!

Get in touch if you’d like to explore 1:1 coaching with me so you can love yourself fully and fearlessly and attract the love you deserve.

Spirituality

I got up at 5am to go to a sober rave and here’s what happened…

April 14, 2018April 14, 2018 Cosmic Kat

I wake up as my alarm goes off.

The time is 5am.

My usual routine is get up, turn off alarm, doze for half an hour and then leave the house in a panicked rush.

Today is different. I’m excited.

I catch my usual tube, taking the central line into London.

In my neon leggings I stand next to men in neatly ironed suits who are on their morning commute.

I’m also on my way to work, but I’ve got somewhere to be first.

This morning I’m going to a sober rave.

Morning Gloryville was founded in London in 2013 by Nico Thoemmes and Sam Moyo and is described as an “immersive morning dance party.”

Since it began it has developed into a global community of conscious clubbers with events taking place all over the world.

The main principals of the community as described in the manifesto are sustainability, love, harmony, evolution, balance, creativity and spiritual growth.

I’ve never been a morning person (aside from slightly manic, stressful periods when I would wake up early or in the middle of the night.)

Generally, I’m always craving five more minutes in bed and before I have my first coffee of the day I don’t feel human so I was skeptical of the idea that an early morning party could “energise” me for the day ahead.

When I arrive at the venue (The Ministry Of Sound) it seems a bit dead.

I’m expecting hoards of people to be queuing up but there’s only a couple milling about in the drizzle.

It’s too early to get in so I make conversation with Sam, a client partner and fellow Morning Gloryville virgin.

“A few of my friends tried it a couple of years ago and they said it was really good fun so I thought I’d give it a try too,” she says.

After having our auras cleansed by Paulina with a feather duster, we go inside where we are offered a hug by one of the “Wake-Up Angels.”

Against the energetic thud of a cool dance beat, an array of glittering, smiling people in brightly-coloured spandex convalesce in the entry room.

There are stalls with smoothies and raw vegan snacks, people contorting themselves into impressive yoga positions and a woman offering Angel Card readings.

It’s like I’ve stepped through the looking glass and into a fantasy world filled with all of my favourite things.

It’s amazing but also slightly overwhelming.

Like a kid in a sweet shop I don’t know what to try first.

In the end I opt for an Angel Card reading with the lovely Gilly Bean.

For Gilly, Morning Gloryville is all about making time in our busy lives to relax and re-focus on what’s truly important to us – whether or not that involves help from the angels.

She says, “It’s a really nice place where people are here enjoying themselves.

“It’s a time to take for yourself and to just enjoy connecting with what messages are coming through for you.”

This particular event is called The Big Spring Clean and has a focus on sustainability.

Everyone is encouraged to bring their own refillable water bottles and there is a station manned by Swapaholics UK where you can trade in and swap second hand clothes.

I bump into a woman I initially clocked on the tube but was too shy to speak to.

Luisa Agliatta, an interdimensional metaphysical healer, has been coming to Morning Gloryville for a couple of years.

She says, “I’ve always loved a good party without all the heaviness of having to drink or take any drugs.

“I’m really not into that because it’s a bit contrary to my work.

“I’m a morning person so I like mornings. It just sets your day off beautifully.

“You get so much energy, meet some nice people and have a nice time.”

The zero alcohol element was also what attracted me to the event.

As a recovering alcoholic I’ve learnt that I can have much more fun sober than I ever had when I was drinking.

For years I’d convinced myself that dancing to shit music in dingy nightclubs, knocking back shots of vodka (which I would vomit up the next day) and blacking out was fun.

It wasn’t.

This is a sentiment that’s shared by Charlie Elliott who’s launching a business in holistic healing and has a background in mental health.

She says, “What’s really beautiful is that I know a lot of people that are in recovery.

“Discovering events and communities like this can be a game changer because it’s like ‘wow you can have so much fun and feel this connected, to people, to music, to expression and creativity without drugs, without any influence.’

“I think that in itself is a really powerful option for people.”

The event is also very inclusive and welcomes people from all walks of life.

Charlie adds, “It’s so diverse. You’ve got all ages, all races, all backgrounds, all religions coming together. It’s almost quite spiritual. We’re all here dancing.

“It’s like family to me.”

After a brief spin on the dance floor it’s time for me to get to work.

My time here was short-lived but there’s no doubt I’ll be back.

Lots of people complain about Londoners being callous and alloof.

But Morning Gloryville has an amazing sense of togetherness, community, joy and vibrancy.

In a room full of strangers, I feel like I belong.